Monday, October 19, 2009

Its been a while...

Wow it has been so long since I have written anything in any of my blogs. If I had any followers, sorry for that. I had all but given up on maintaining my blogs. But looking back on what I had written more than 2 years, I am amazed to see I am practically having the same conversations with myself. Waking up too late, eating wrong, not cleaning my house enough. Holy crap.

These problems have never gotten fixed, and also, I am still trying the same old techniques and thinking the same old things about myself and how I will fix them. What does this all mean? Will they ever be fixed then? I really don't know, but looking at my old entries has been such an eye opener.

I feel rather distraught and so confused. Am I not looking at my problems with the right perspective? Am I missing some piece of the puzzle? And if so, what is it?

Am I missing the motivation to turn what I think about problems into action? I tried baby steps. I try total transformation. I try not even thinking about it and just accepting the problem about myself. This is so strange. I mean, I knew I have continued to struggle with my problems. In fact, they have gotten worse. I weigh more than I did 2 years ago, and I am in more debt. I am really at a loss here.



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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I just found your blog this afternoon and was sad to read this entry. I hope you will continue to strive and become self-disciplined and ultimately happy with your lifestyle. I too am going through a similar set of problems but I am tackling them bit by bit and am so far, happy with the results. One thing I tried is hypnotherapy (just had my 4th session yesterday) and as far as I can tell, it is actually working. I'd give it a shot. There are also self-hypnosis books (check on Amazon) which claim to work just as well (but I like using a therapist as it feels great to talk to someone who can help). Best of luck and I hope you continue to update us on your progress.